You might think I’m cloaking.
But I
am not.
So afraid to find out
that someone IS something else than they present to be.
Afraid that they might be cloaking.
Might be disingenuous.
Pretending to be something “they are not”.
Fronting.
Playing you/me/we.
Inauthentic.
Yet when it comes to ME
to my ability
My need
To have privacy
To have secrets
I got secrets to stay alive.
To keep my legality
To be here for fucks sake
For my own survival
Cause I want to be here
Don’t you want me
I have to lie.
We/you/me have always had to lie
Bend the rules
To survive
Cause the laws aren’t drawn in your/my favour
And believe me,
I will bend
Them
And sometimes I just want to, okay?
Code switch, morph, become camouflage, integrate, assimilate, learn a new language–
to fit
Not only to survive but just cause I want to
Maybe it feels good
Maybe I just want to gender fuck
Maybe I want to pretend I can afford this drink that’s 15% of my total wage.
Maybe I want to transition
Need to.
Transition.
A matter of survival.
Or maybe just tonight
I want to be something different on the outside than what you think I am
Some truths
Should not come to light
Some stones overturned–
Lead to violence !
My stones! My truths!
But You/me should accept when I/we tell you/me.
Believe what they are saying
You are not just a racist in woke clothing are you?
You are not just a rich man in poor woman drag are you ?
Or what “are you” ?
But goddess forbid you are as genuine as I am.