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Author Archives: alfabus

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not THE PROBLEM

Posted on October 4, 2020 by alfabus

when i moved to berlin in 2004 exactly on this weekend my rent was 75€ for my room. i got a job dancing at sage club on the bar for 80€ on a friday or saturday night for four 45 … Continue reading →

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Making the Deadline

Posted on October 4, 2020 by alfabus

When I was a young person, a teenager, and especially when I left grade school and finally had agency over my own education … I started to wake up to how fucked up the world is, always has been, creates … Continue reading →

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This Morning Waking (2000 – 2020)

Posted on July 14, 2020 by alfabus

  This Morning Waking (2000 – 2020) THIS MORNING WAKING is not only an EP, it is also a body of work — lyrical prose, essay and performance — that practices, performs, and processes some of Mad Kate’s earliest writings … Continue reading →

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Relations

Posted on April 30, 2020 by alfabus

When the hard rain comes it leaks through the glass pained roof above my bed nook. It doesnt leak enough to fill buckets but it cries tears through the metal seams and lands in soft patches on my bed. I … Continue reading →

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this is not a war this is a nonviolent protest

Posted on April 5, 2020 by alfabus

this is not a war we are going through. this is a non violent protest a resistance. our bodies are on the line, not all of us, but some of us especially collectively those not on the front lines must … Continue reading →

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the anxiety from which i speak – part 2 quarantine

Posted on March 20, 2020 by alfabus

When the quarantine hit a lot of things broke. Yes, the fear of death hit us, the fear of no work, the fear of survival, the fear of the future, the fear of not knowing. But also, for some of … Continue reading →

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Now more than ever: Digital Intimacies and Support

Posted on March 13, 2020 by alfabus

To those who can support artists during this time, please remember that those of us who are living in the gig economy have lost all of our work and most of us have absolutely no safety set. All of my … Continue reading →

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fear of performance.

Posted on March 12, 2020 by alfabus

Speaking of “from which anxieties do i speak?” I think one of the anxieties from which I and others speak is a fear of performance. Performance, in this sense, is the fear of performing something which is not real. An … Continue reading →

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Proximities (thinking about different kinds of proximity)

Posted on February 28, 2020 by alfabus

NOTES ON … PROXIMITIES …. Been spending a lot of thinking time with the word PROXIMITY. Realizing in the process that I should probably be using the word PROXIMITIES instead of just PROXIMITY to begin to get to all the … Continue reading →

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The Anxiety From Which I Speak – Thinking After Butler

Posted on February 28, 2020 by alfabus

I have been thinking about the ideas Judith Butler presented when she lectured on 31st January 2020 at TU Berlin. Firstly, although it happened a seemingly off-the-cuff moment, they asserted their preferred pronoun as “they” (I found this quite historic) … Continue reading →

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